Just because I subscribe to the Gestapo approach to motherhood doesn’t mean that I’m totally immune to the occasional bout of Accidental Parenting. Accidental parenting refers to all those times when a lapse of good intentions create a habit so ingrained you never succeed in reversing it. The children who can’t go to sleep unless […]
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What would the nanny want with your pants?
“They’ve vanished – every single pair.” We’re going away for a weekend wedding and my husband is tearing around the house looking for a pair of pants. There is not a single pair to be found anywhere. “The nanny must have taken them.” “Don’t be ridiculous – why on earth would the nanny take them?” […]
Self-service
Supermarket shopping has got easier since the days when I was hounded by security staff for trolley abuse, and now I quite enjoy walking up and down the aisles with the pygmies in tow. So, the cupboards bare, I throw the kids in the car after work and decamp to the small Sainsbury’s in town […]
Motorway tail-backs and the surprising capacity of a nappy
We’re an hour into the stationary tail-back. The M40 snakes back through South Oxfordshire; an inert mass of cars filled with would-be shoppers. You know it’s bad when people start getting out of their cars, sitting on the hard shoulder with make-shift picnics and swapping numbers with the family in the Touran next to them. […]
Catering for marital sex
Yesterday the Husband and I seized the moment and had sex in the kitchen. This is not the first time it has happened there; it’s not that there’s anything particularly erotic about our kitchen, simply that we tend to be in there at the same time, which is a rarity nowadays. Half-way through (not that […]
What are boobs for?
Eating out at lunchtime is not a regular event. What with the number of highchairs required and the need to work around The Routine, it’s simply easier to stay at home. From time to time, however, the call of the skinny latte is too strong for me to resist, and I load up the triple […]