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Yummy Mummy versus Scummy Mummy

October 13, 2010 By Clare Mackintosh

Yesterday I wore a Jack Wills dress over skinny jeans. Today I’m wearing my husband’s tracksuit bottoms and a pyjama top.

Yesterday my hair was blow-dryed and styled into sexy flicks. Today it is standing on end as though I’ve spent the entire morning rubbing myself with a polyester cardigan.

Yesterday I wore kitten heels. Today I’m wearing chicken poo. On the sole of my Uggs. Which aren’t even real.

Yesterday I ate home-made falafel from Cath Kidston plates.  Today I am scoffing Coco-pops from a plastic mug because all our crockery is dirty.

Yesterday I greeted my husband with a come-hither smile and the smell of fresh-baked bread.  Today I screeched at him from the landing as I caught child-vomit in my hands.

Yesterday I baked fairy cakes with the children. Today I am eating them. All.

Yesterday I was a Yummy Mummy, today I am a Scummy Mummy.  Tomorrow I may not bother getting up at all…

…

Filed Under: Parenting

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